Through my Dog's Eyes

It is a little brisk but almost a perfect summer evening on the deck... just me and my dogs. I just got to thinking... what is life like through a dog's eyes?

One is old and yellow.... with a white nose and worn face he is well past 12 years old. The other just getting started at 9. Sparky can barly sit down while Terrell could play ball everyday of the week. Today i was just watching Sparky realizing that his life is about to the end and it got me to thinking.

Life must be so interesting from a dogs perspective. One day we are picking them out as little kids so excited to have them at home and the next we are way to busy for them. They just sit and wait for us to come and play... but so often we don't. We leave them to lay in the sun or fetch their own ball. Sad day.

I guess that this week I have really been thinking a lot about life. I have spent a lot of time with my grandma lately who is on the older side. She has had a lot of health problems and needs to be watched constantly. I thought about it the other day and wondered what it must be like for her. Ever since she left home at 18, she has been able to basically take care of herself. Of course she got married and had children, but she has been responsible for herself. It breaks my heart to think that now she needs someone to be with her 90 percent of the time. It is hard for her to get out of her chair and a struggle for her to go without a nap every few hours. I wonder how hard that is for her.

I guess that it makes me want to stay healthy and young as long as possible, not because I don't want to go through the stages of life, but because of how dependent she has become once again.

Sometimes I feel like people tell me that I am too crazy with all these dreams and things I want to try... but having this picture of getting older has shown me how short life really is. I know that my grandma has had so many amazing moments, but it makes me want to spread my wings more now than ever! I want to taste the mango in Africa and walk the grass of Ireland. I want to talk with Canadians and eat rice in Japan. I want to get up off my rear and try the things that seem so distant but are on my heart. Life is so short!

So next week when we put my adorable old dog down, I am going to remember the little moments. The moments when we would put him in my wagon on the back of the riding lawn mower for hours. I will remember the way he would chase his tail around and around. Though we often times left him, He was always there... waiting and hoping we would come back to him.

I want to be that good to people. I want to hold no grudges and play no favorites. I want to listen with open ears and hold back my anger. I want to play just for the heck of it and lay out in the sun because I want to. I want to have a family and live life to the fullest!

I know that this was a kinda funny parrallel. But I guess that I have just had the idea of death on my mind for a day or two and realized that life is going to go way too fast. I want to enjoy all the little moments and play ball with my dogs more!

Back Home Again

Dang I am in a weird space right now. I feel really energized and ready for an amazing summer, but kinda have no direction yet. As of today, I have a weekly babysitting job and nothing else. Now, I have not begun my full blown search since my friend Jess is hanging out in town for another day... but I am excited for the new search.

I cannot believe that I am a senior in college. That is out of control. It is so funny, because I don't know but one day i just woke up and realized i had to be a big kid now. I read this Total Money Makeover book by Dave Ramsey in like 5 days and loved it. I know want to set up an entire budget, figure out how to save as much money as I can this summer and start paying off my car. I am so jazzed that this summer I am going to be able to start making habits that could change the course of the rest of my life. I know that God gives us money, but I tend to spend it in all the wrong ways. I do not need half the crap I buy... but realizing how much I spend is the first big key. We shall see... i wanna get this budget thing down for sure!

I have a lot of goals for this summer...

1. Interview My Grandma
2. Take some Salsa Lessons
3. Build back up to 8 miles
4. Get 5 top-notch informational interviews
5. Laugh a lot!
6. Learn how to budget
7. Learn a few meals to cook
8. Read 10 Books

I think that this summer is going to be weird living at home. It is going to be interesting just learning to be a servant instead of so selfish. I think that I am going to miss my roomate like crazy. I want to soak up this last summer and not allow the days to slip by like they always do. I would love to meet some new faces and make some new friends. I want to dream and think of possibilities that could help me in the future. I want to have a positive attitude and listen for where God is taking me. AHHHHH... i can't believe it is already summer again.